Excuse Me, James?

Excuse me, James?

I am turning 50 years old this spring, and am agonizing slightly of the thought of being “over the hill.” I was hoping that, as a young person, you could give me some advice to help ease the pain of this milestone in my life. I don’t really want to spend a lot of money during this mid-life crisis, like buying a car that is associated with young people. Do you have any thoughts?

Sincerely,
Bittersweet-Birthday Boy

Dear Bitter-Sweet Birthday Boy,

You can be assured that I have thoughts; whether or not they’re useful is less of a given. Fifty years is a long time. I’m sure it’s hard to think about having lived half of a century, but I bet it hasn’t felt near that long. The way I see it, if Rome was built in a day, it’s safe to say that 18,250 days has obviously turned you into a well oiled machine. Not a bad thought, huh? If you bend it the right way, logic will always brighten up the worst of situations.

Considering I’m on the sunny side of twenty years old, I decided that all of the advice I would have to give would be purely speculation from an age-inexperienced point of view. To more appropriately answer your question, I did some advice outsourcing to a couple of folks that I know have spent a few years on their way down the hill. In other words, I called my parents, both of whom actually had a few good things to say (not to sound surprised or anything).

One of the strategies mentioned by my father was the idea of keeping things fresh. Picking up new hobbies and setting new goals will always give you something to look forward to. As your family responsibilities lessen, you’ll have time to build that canoe you’ve always wanted, or train for the marathon that’s been in the back of your mind. In all likelihood, you already know what those things are.

In my mother’s opinion, staying positive and having a good outlook on life can be accomplished by being thankful for how far you’ve already made it. Many people don’t ever reach this milestone and get to experience the joy of knowing you’ve built an accomplished life over fifty years. Another idea for maintaining a positive attitude is to try to think of five things you’re thankful for before bed each night. I can all but guarantee that you won’t have trouble finding blessings in your life.

Essentially, my advice is for you to hang in there. Soon enough, you’ll be eligible for AARP. That’s kind of cool, right? Simply remember to be proud of your age the older you get. Your life’s well seasoned, fermented, and if actually a wine, worth upwards of $640.32 a bottle. So drink up, reminisce about the glory days, and prepare for the years to come. You’re not dead yet; I suggest you get busy living.

Questions can either be submitted by email to excusemejames@gmail.com or through campus mail to James Hall.

Word to the Wise:
“Old age is not so bad when you consider the alternative.”
– Maurice Chevalier